Wednesday, December 1, 2010

The Primary suspect

So I came in early again, cool, extra $$ that I didn't have before. I found out that full timers get this extra pay in December, from working holidays after and between certain late night hours. It comes out to an extra 600-700 bucks. Nice. Not for part-timers, like me though. I only work 3 hours less and the same late nights, *sigh* no extra monies for me. :( Someday I will be full time and work those 3 extra damn hours then get the bonus, vacation days, sick days, pay into the pension, pay raise and extra money when I get called in. Am I bitter? Nah, I'm next in line, woo!!!

Got a woman who called me on 911 today that was very hard to get through without being sarcastic, laughing or condescending.

Me: 911 what is your emergency?
Tired Mom: My son won't go to school.
Me: Excuse me?
Tired Mom: My son refuses to go to school. He just stands there.
Me: How old is he?
Tired Mom: Six.
Me: Excuse me?
Tired Mom: I need the police.
Me: Why? **thinking**oh you need something girlie but it ain't the police, it's a number 10 boot
Tired Mom: Because he won't go to school.
Me: Are you calling from *secret address* and is your phone number *secret phone number*?
Tired Mom: *annoyed huff* Yes.
Me: Does he have a weapon? (yes by this time I am annoyed and going through my 'normal' standard questions for 911 calls)
Tired Mom: What?
Me: Does he have a weapon? Gun, knife, bat, bear mace ...
Tired Mom: No no no
Me: Has he been drinking?
Tired Mom: What? He's six!
Me: Well I'm trying to figure out why you called 911. I'm taking you off 911 and transferring you to by non emergency line. Please hold.

So she ended up wanting us to come by and not only make junior go to school but to take him there as well. I ended up telling her that there was no way that I'd send an officer for that reason and that she, as the parent, would have to deal with him. She said I wasted her tax payer money and hung up. By the way I picked up a trait from one of my former bosses. I do cuss at the phone six seconds after they hang up so it's not on the taped line. It makes me feel better.

I remember one of my first bosses in an advertising business would be all sweet on the phone. This proper old British lady and then right after she put the phone down she'd cuss like a bloody sailor.

Last night shift was slow so they played a movie on the televising that was installed in case we had to watch 'up to the minute' weather forecasts during emergency disasters. Yeah, we watch movies and this jib jab thing on the Internet. It's this random thing where you can stick people's faces inside these animations and they do different things. They put one guy in it a lot and he apparently is a very talented dancer. Anyways I was talking to an officer, thank god, and was just logging him off for the night. We were chatting and suddenly a girl in the movie flashes the camera and I holler "Ack boobs!" Well the officer was intrigued and slightly confused. Embarrassing a little. I tried to explain ... let's just the conversation didn't get any better from there.

Just got done my second day today so now I have two nights to look forward to. Tomorrow I am assisting in the training of some new investigators which is cool. I wanted to role play a dead body but they wouldn't let me. :( I also volunteered to be the suspect and get arrested, but no. They wanted me to play dispatch. Fine. Next time I'm either the DB or the Perp. I uh ... passed down the option to be tased. Also have to face the malls after training and before shift to do some Christmas shopping and to try to pay off my mom's ring for Christmas. It's an interesting choice. Do I be tased or face the mall ... very hard choice here. Either way I'm going to be sore from head to toe and laying limp on the floor. At least the officers wouldn't trample me.


  1. It can be difficult to be professional with some of the ridiculous things call authorities for. I always hated being dispatched to those calls, but sometimes it is better to be safe than sorry.

    Sounds like you did well.

  2. Oh yeah. I remember my mom always said, 'be polite to rude people, it pisses them off.' harder some days than others, as sarcasm is my first language.